things people have called me

i may be misremembering some of them

-sincere

-really sincere

-a fucking clown

-a genuinely nice guy. but not a Nice Guy

-too generous

-cute

-a pussy who runs away from his problems

-a sweet doting bf

-a fucking god (fucking is an adverb here)

-my own type of guy

-someone who’s “too weird” to introduce to their “normal friends”

-sweet

-someone who doesn’t have “that dog” in them, but is “that dog”

-funny

-crazy

-“fucking crazy”

-insane

-powerful

-someone with powerful energy

-one of the homies

-real

-extremely affable

-not creepy

-smart but doesn’t apply himself

-embarrassing

-the modern day eve babbitz

-mike crumplar’s “bosom buddy”

-“king of downtown”

-new york’s last renaissance man

-a socialite

-an angel

-someone who will shorten their lifespan by years, simply by hanging out with me

-someone who will “never be hitler”

-someone’s “favorite neopet on their phone to check on” 

-a jew (too many times to count)

-a stupid slutty jew

-a stupid bitch

-a smelly whore

-cool

-the Art Boy of the family

-“your favorite tweeter’s favorite tweeter”

-someone who “looks like he’s a good writer but struggles with alcohol”

-someone who sees everything

-someone with an infinite battery

-someone who is nice to all the creatures of the earth

-someone with an addictive personality

-someone who is part of the “new dimes square”

-someone who has never had an original thought in their life

-autistic